Men in Black: International (2019) - Review

Review:

*Originally written June 17th, 2019*

The Men in Black franchise has never been one of the best franchises in the world, but it sure as hell deserves better than this abysmal reboot/spin-off. This is just another generic, uninspired Hollywood film that forgets what made the original films watchable.

It lacks anything close to an identity, as it just steals parts of other franchise films in order to make something so forgettable, it's embarrassing. Every aspect of Men in Black: International just feels like it's from something else. It's got the ugly boring CGI of any other overblown summer film, the lame comedy from Marvel films aimed at 6 year-olds and even the incredibly overdone "Portal in the sky" finale that we've seen countless times for the past decade.

I will admit, I did have some mild faith in this. F. Gary Gray just directed the extremely entertaining Fate of the Furious and Chris Hemsworth and Tessa Thompson worked together wonderfully in Thor: Ragnarok, so it seemed at the very least this would be an entertaining film with some creative action and two likeable leads.

It is not. Hemsworth lacks any kind of charm or charisma that he's known for, with a character so empty, uninspired and boring with quippy lines that do not land in the slightest. I can't believe his comedic chops were put to better use in the female led Ghostbusters reboot from a few years ago. Tessa Thompson on the other hand, fares a lot better, with a much more interesting character arc.

I was worried they were gonna rehash a lot from the original with her story-line by having her mirror the path Will Smith's Agent J went on, but instead she's someone who has spent her whole life looking to join the Men in Black after they failed to have her memory erased as a child. It least meant we didn't have to have this character go through all the same training we'd seen before, as she's instead shoved straight into action in the form of a mission to London and ends up partnering with Chris Hemsworth's Agent H.

From then on it just becomes a boring, generic and predictable story with twists that you'd have to be absolutely brain-dead to not see coming within the first half hour. I don't mind a predictable story, as long as there's something fun going on during it or it at least has interesting characters and creative action. International carries none of that. It all just feels like a painful chore.

Even Thompson and Hemsworth partnership lacks the chemistry we know they have based on Thor, so it was bizarre to see them work together in a way that lacked any sort of charm. They sorely lack anything close to Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones' heart and chemistry that carried the trilogy. Thinking about it know, I assume they were hired based on Ragnarok and then they just assumed it would work, but failed to write a script with any sort of wit or nuance that would suit them. 

There's not even the incredible and practical creature designs from the first few films, it's just weightless and flat CGI that feels far too smooth and glossy. What made the originals so great is just how off-putting and weird these creature designs once were, it felt risky and weird to make something that would potentially put people off it. Here, it's just a lame attempt to make the appeal broader in order to obviously continue to branch out the series. 

Not a single part of this film felt like it was made by people who actually cared about what they were making. It just feels like a checklist of what these big-budget summer films have as they check it off one by one without any sort of creative input or style. Men in Black 2 is not a great film by any means, but even that had far more going for it than this pathetic piece of garbage.


Men in Black: International is just Hollywood film-making at its worst, completely soulless, cynical and generic to the point I have no desire to see this series I grow up with continue. The last thing I'd expect to be from a Men in Black film is bored, but hey, 2019 continues to disappoint with their franchise films. I shouldn't have expected anything less.

3/10 Dans

Men in Black: International is out now in cinemas in the UK
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Bad Times at the El Royale (2018) - Cinema Review

Review:

*Originally written October 19th, 2018*

Bad Times at the El Royale feels like its stuck in the '90s, which isn't a bad thing. This clearly Tarantino inspired feels exactly like the sort of film that came out just after Reservoir Dogs, riffing on Tarantino's formula, and for the most part, it works. 

It's a hard one to talk about without spoilers. A group of strangers arrive at the El Royale Hotel, each with a different secret and complicated past. Some more interesting than others, but it all comes to a head when Chris Hemsworth's Charles Manson like cult leader 'Billy Ray' gets involved.

I'm not the biggest fan of Drew Goddard's work so far. I really wanted to like Cabin in the Woods, but just found it remarkably okay and a bit of a slog to get through (I will revisit it at some point though). Goddard clearly has an understanding of genre film-making that has largely been untapped as I can tell he's so much more capable than the films he produces. I will say El Royale is a huge improvement on Cabin at the very least.

Being a Tarantino style film, Goddard does indulge in some of Tarantino's faults. For instance, this is barbarically overlong. So much is drawn out and felt borderline insane to even exist within the film. We see the same event from several different angles multiple times throughout, and it got a little grating. This could have easily done with another round in the editing room.

But in terms of the good stuff, it's pretty much excellent all round. Every single cast member does an excellent job, even with such a talented and diverse cast, everyone feels on the same level and no one stuck out as wasted or pointless. It was incredible to see a film where I actually understood what Jeff Bridges was saying, which is a huge rarity these days. 

The central mystery is constantly intriguing and helped by the marketing which told us pretty much nothing about the film, but really hurt its commercial performance at the same time. It builds up to a spectacular finale involving Chris Hemsworth who completely steals the show. It was so great to see him as the villain and I instantly wanted to ravage him and join his family every moment he was on screen. He just oozed charisma and brought alive every second of his brief performance. I just wish he was in it more, as he completely dominated every scene he was in, despite only showing up in the final act.


Bad Times at the El Royale is a step the right direction for Goddard. An overlong, but intriguing mystery thriller with an excellent cast and gonzo final act brought alive due to the pure psychotic charisma of Chris Hemsworth.

7/10 Dans

Bad Times at the El Royale is out now in cinemas in the UK
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Thor: Ragnarok (2017) - Film Review

Review:

*Originally written October 26th, 2017*

"Third time's the charm"

They finally did it. It took Marvel three attempts, but they've finally made a Thor solo film that didn't make me want to kill myself. The first two Thor films are by far the worst outings of the MCU (Aside from the pathetic Age of Ultron). Thankfully, Disney seem to finally be allowing directors to finally take creative control and make unique films. For the third time in a row this year, Marvel have knocked it out the park and have finally dropped that garbage televisual look many of their films have.

Thor: Ragnarok is a gorgeous, gorgeous film with a striking and varied colour palette. They seem to be moving more in the direction of Guardians of the Galaxy with its zany and cosmic weirdness and they embrace it, which I loved. There's so many cool and different sci-fi ideas and designs here to embrace here. It's the only Thor film that I feel will grow on me with each watch. 

Chris Hemsworth is still great as The God of Thunder, Thor. Playing it charming and funny. There's not much range outside of that, but I'll get to that with my main problem with the film. I was surprised by Tom Hiddleston as Loki here. Loki is a character I've grown sick of in the recent years. We get it, he's smug and slimy, there's been a few times for him to stretch, but being played as the joke rather than the threat really worked here. Mark Ruffalo is a welcome return as Bruce Banner/The Hulk, it's shame we'll probably never get a solo film with him, but Ruffalo continues to be an excellent Hulk. The visual effects artist also seem to improve him with each portrayal too.

What makes Thor: Ragnarok so strong is just how much fun it is. We jump from location to location. Most of the film takes place on a planet run by an overlord played by the always excellent Jeff Goldblum, where Thor is forced to be a gladiator while his home is being taken over by a new threat 'Hela' (Cate Blanchett). I always appreciate when these films tell their own stories without the need to be annoyingly connected with the rest of the MCU. Aside from a couple of references, Ragnarok stand completely on its own. 

My main problem with Ragnarok is the same problem I had with Guardians of the Galaxy: Volume 2. The jokes. There's just too many and they weigh down any kind of emotion the film could have had. It seemed any moment there was potential for a tense scene, it would be undercut by a joke. Not to say it wasn't funny, most of the jokes are actually very solid. It's just I wish they'd let some stuff breathe more and make us care. It's all good fun, but it felt like a very emotionless film, despite some of the big events that happen.

Then there's a common problem with Marvel films. The villain. Cate Blanchett doesn't give a bad performance at all, she's actually pretty fun in the role, hamming it up completely. It's just there's not a lot to the character, making her another disposable Marvel villain that will be quickly forgotten. At the very least, it's an improvement on those stupid goblins from The Dark World. Karl Urban is also pretty wasted as the secondary villain, he has a moment to shine towards the end, but was mostly just there.

If there's a big problem Marvel overcame this time, it's the score. Ragnarok delivers a wonderfully '80s electronic score that suited the film perfectly from Mark Mothersbaugh. It's the first film from the MCU where I've actually remembered stuff from the score. There's also a few choice songs spread throughout. 

Marvel are now officially 3 for 3 with their MCU films this year and Thor: Ragnarok is a massive improvement on the previous two films. It's a little hollow, but it's a gorgeous, fun and funny blast of a sci-fi adventure. Keep it up, Marvel. 

8/10 Dans

Thor: Ragnarok is out now in cinemas in the UK

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